Forced to Sign a Virginity Pledge

The teacher of a Catholic school distributed the sheets of paper, and told a whole class of girls to sign below the line that said, “I will not have sex before I get married.”

I was in feakin’ high school then. I had no plans or even a budding interest to lose my virginity, but I didn’t want to sign the pledge.

Of course the pledge can’t stop me from having sex, but just the thought that all of us didn’t have a choice but to sign it, that it was so easy for the teacher to shove this down our throats as though it was a pillar of truth and not an opinion of religion–it all just made me feel bad.

I had half the mind to not sign, but I was afraid. The signing of the pledge wasn’t done privately. I was in the midst of my classmates and in full view of my teacher. Now I wonder, what would have happened if I refused to sign? Would they give me an offense? Take me down from the honor roll? Expel me?

Was my school just weird or does this happen in other all-girls Catholic schools? Do all-boys or co-ed Catholic schools have this ritual of forcing students to sign virginity pledges? If not, why are all-girls Catholic schools more obsessed with controlling women’s sexuality? Why are women guilt tripped to be virgins while men are not?

This is insane because men (if they are not homosexual or asexual) have sex with women (if they are not lesbian or asexual), so how can the men be losing their virginities before marriage, and women are not, when the act of sex happens between the two of them?

Forcing women to be virgins is as terrible as coercing women to have sex. Women should be allowed to decide whether they want to be virgins, sluts, or moderately sexually active. The demon is not virginity or sex, but the demon is coercion–that overbearing force that either strips women of their choices or covers them invisible.

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4 thoughts on “Forced to Sign a Virginity Pledge

  1. It’s too bad you weren’t able to save that document (or did you). That itself would make a great art piece, for example if used as a book cover for a compilation of stories of catholic school girls who did or didn’t follow that pledge. Contributors would remain anonymous, of course.


    1. I wasn’t able to save it because the teacher made us pass the pledges to her, but it would be interesting if I had a copy. I never thought of making a book out of Catholic school girls stories, but that’s a great idea!


  2. Hmm. It would be interesting to see if all-boy Catholic schools required the same written confirmation. Isn’t that part of basic Catholic doctrine, though, to not have pre-marital sex?


    1. Yes it is part of the basic Catholic doctrine, but I guess there’s a difference between teaching it and forcing girls to sign pledges. Yeah I wonder if the boys in Catholic schools were also made to do this.


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