When someone rejects you, the worst thing to ask is: is there something wrong with me? I used to do this in the past, but now I have stopped blaming myself for other people’s choices.
This was once hard for me. I remember being rejected by the first guy I ever loved. I was in college, and I was finally in a co-ed school. I had long been locked up in an all-girls school for years, and during my stint there, I did not make an effort to go to soirees or to the friendship bridge, the bridge between my school Miriam College and the all boys-school Ateneo (grade school and high school).
I didn’t do those things because I was too young to be interested in romantic stuff. Also, I was arrogant. I was so confident that I was beautiful enough to easily snag the guy I wanted once I met him.
I did meet him, but he didn’t want me. He wanted someone else; he wanted my best friend.
It took a while before I recovered from that pain, and I learned a lot from it. One is that people make choices, and you cannot control what they want, so even if there’s nothing really wrong with you, they might not decide to commit to you, and that’s ok. It’s not your fault.
So the next time I liked a guy, and he seemed interested, but then the thing fizzled out, I wasn’t as broken as I was before. That was his choice, and I can’t force him to do otherwise, but what I can do is make my own choice.
I did not blame myself; I chose to move on.
More Love. That’s it:
- I Will Never Be Scarred
- Imagined Conversation: I Like You
- Snippets of Love
- The Kalamay Effect
- Where are the real love stories?
- Why Can’t I Accept the Fact that I Didn’t Love Him?
Check out my other blog categories.
Note: For some entries in this blog, a few names and details have been deliberately and willingly changed by the author. This is a personal decision made by the author for specific reasons known to her and is not an endorsement for censorship.
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