Books that had a lasting impact on my life (Book 2: How to Win Friends)

People think that How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie is a guidebook for manipulation, but they are gravely mistaken. If you read the book carefully, there’s a line there that says “I am not suggesting flattery. I’m talking about a new way of life.” That new way of life means understanding that “criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself”. He also says, “instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism and it breeds sympathy, tolerance, and kindness.”

In many instances this mindset makes complete sense. I must admit though that practicing it is difficult. It’s easier to judge someone. It’s easier to find something lacking in them. This advice though is slowly shifting my mindset, and I am continuously thinking about how I can apply the advice in real life. So far, I have read the book twice and made some notes. I am thinking of rereading it again for the third time and maybe focus on one particular advice for a month until it becomes a natural response. Wish me luck!

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5 thoughts on “Books that had a lasting impact on my life (Book 2: How to Win Friends)

  1. i’ve heard and read a lot of things about this book that i’ve sort of branded it as one of the ultimate self-help books out there. i bought a copy a few months back but it’s still sitting on my shelf at the moment waiting for me to finish this book that i’m reading right now. if you’ve read it twice then it should be good.

    oh, and good luck! =)


    1. Yes, it’s a really good book. There are lots of insights, but I’m still trying to apply it in my life. It’s kind of challenging to do so. I’m sure you’ll like it too 🙂 Hope you tell me what you think about the book once you finish reading it. Thanks for your comment, Jewey!


      1. i tried to look for it online if my local library has it. they don’t. so i watched the author’s ted talk about the topic on youtube instead. he did have some pretty good points. i feel like everything has been succinctly explained that i don’t need to read the book anymore. hehe.


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